Gertrude Marie Melia

Eulogy for my grandmother at the funeral - PART 1

Hi my name is Kristen Cherry and I am Gertrude’s granddaughter. I want to THANK EVERYONE for taking the time to be with us on this day of tribute.

As a family we weren’t really sure on the best way to pay tribute to a woman like my grandmother...After my brother, mom and I talked about some of our favorite memories as a family– it really felt like we were putting together a bracelet with the “charms of her life” – and we wanted to share a few of our favorite charms with you her friends and family.

CHARMS:

HEART CHARM:
While my grandmother’s dad was alive she told me they had more than many. She often told me the story of state issued shoes during the depression. At that time, her family did not qualify for these because her dad still had a job - but they were the style because “sadly” everyone else had them. She told me that both she and her sister Dorothy wanted the state issued depression shoes.

Unfortunetley her father passed away when she was 14 years old and left her mother Mary with 3 teenagers and two small children. Her family was limited in the material things after that but they were abundant in love.

TOOTH CHARM:
My grandma cleaned the office for a dentist to help earn money for her family. One of the stories she told me was about a Christmas where her family would’ve had nothing – but this year there was a knock on the door and some small presents and food were delivered anonymously. Although the dentist never admitted that he had been the “angel” that had provided for them at Christmas, she always knew it was him.

This same dentist at the age of 18 allowed my grandmother to borrow $125 from him so she could move to Washington DC and work as a government girl. In those days she mentioned that she only was making about $14.50/week. She was always proud to tell me how she was paid this angel of a man his money back in 5 months….

*These stories have always made me see the good when people need assistance in this world….I’ve never wanted to focus on the people who may abuse the system or take what they shouldn’t because I know what the assistance meant to my grandmother after her father passed away.

OWL CHARM:
We all felt grandma was a wise woman.

Our family has a few nuggets of wisdom we wanted to share -

Mom remembers when she was 16, she thought she was one of the dumbest people I knew, but boy did she gain IQ points as I got older.

"Go to school and get a good education because that is something that no one can take away. " – and my brother and I surely received this same message through Mom.

When my Mom was young and she would try to tell on a friend she was playing with and tried to get her involved, she’d say "you don't have to share your toys with your friends, you can always go have fun playing by yourself. "

She also didn't believe in getting involved in my mom’s problems because she always felt like kids would get over things and adults would always carry a grudge.

My Mom does remember having a curfew but a very loose one because her Mom never wanted her speeding home to meet a curfew time. She wanted Mom home safe….and my brother laughed and said she did always drive below the speed limit.

And lastly, she always wanted Mom to have a dime or a quarter with her at all times when she was dating. She said If Mom ever wanted to leave she’d be able to call a cab and Grandma would take care of it when Mom got home.

Eulogy for my grandmother at the funeral - PART 2

BINGO CHARM:
When my grandmother moved to live with my Mom almost 10 years ago, Mom wanted to make sure that grandma had a “social” life outside of just her.

In recent years she found joy in going to bingo and her joy wasn't from winning at bingo, although she liked that, but from the kindness of the people who were there. I think she found as much joy from giving as keeping her prizes.

In the last few days she told me many stories of how her friends would jump up and grab her coffee, or come to her and sit down at her table, she felt the love from those frineds.

HOME CHARM:
She loved her neighborhood and the people she met here in Snellville, GA. She often said if she could have gotten around better she would have chosen to be with you her friends more. And, when she would meet someone she really liked, she’d say "they should live in our neighborhood. "

COOKIE OR A SWEETS CHARM:
My Mom’s friends were always amazing to her and those who knew her well knew of her sweet tooth and often brought her cakes, cookies and her beloved lemon squares.
I was very lucky to have gotten to make a last batch of her favorite Christmas sugar cookies on this trip – something she looked forward to every year during this time of the season.

CROSS CHARM:
At 93 you would think you wouldn’t be able to get down on your knees and say your bedtime prayers or for that matter get up – but up until 4 days before her passing she knelt by her bedside to say her prayers every night.

SANTA CHARM:
Christmas was always a time that brought our family together. Many of pictures and memories involve this time of year.

My grandmother knew she could count on my brother’s Hickory Farm sausage or specialty mustards, and she made it known each year that she was looking forward to that annual gift.

Her great grandchildren spent 6 Christmas’ visiting from Colorado and spent time really getting to know my grandma. It was so important for me to make sure that my children knew her and I feel truly blessed that they did have a relationship with her.

And if I had all the time in world we would have a
- bread charm, rummy card game charm, sorry board game charm, shopping charm, coffee cup charm, dog charm, water aerobics charm, Tennessee sports charm, sewing charm, and a political television charm

WALKER WITH NO SYMBOL CHARM:
This one makes me smile and laugh because anyone who has known my grandmother especially in the last 8 years knows she has had trouble walking a bit.

People would always ask my mom (including me) me if she had a walker. SHE DID have a walker but never used it. I remember Mom and I conspiring on ways to have it appear in her room so she might use it. She used it one, to move it to the corner in her bedroom….and one of the last things she said to my Mom no more than 30 minutes before her passing was to move the walker and get it out of her way. What can I say...until the end no walker.

I’ll simply end with the words of Winnie the Pooh – How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.

Thank you.

We wanted to send our thoughts and prayers to Jean and her family. Gert was a very nice, strong and funny lady. We would talk to her every Saturday and she would tell stories of her childhood and hometown and of course talk about her daughter, grandkids, great grand kids and her "grand" dogs. She would always say that she was happy when she moved to GA to be with her daughter and plus she now had a dog. And mostly she would talk about her favorite show; Dancing with the Stars, she loved it a lot. She use to talk to her brother Frank every Saturday before he died and they would talk about everything; from food, to history, the hometown, relatives and the state of the country. I think they waited for each Saturday to talk to each other. He got a kick out of her calling him her baby brother (which he was), but he was taller and bigger than her and he always said not much of a baby anymore. We enjoyed when she would get to Stevens Point and she came several times. She was also happy when we visited her in Knoxville and she got to show us around. Gert will be missed by everyone she knew and we will miss her and her phone calls. Again, we are sorry for your loss. Take comfort in her memories. Love from your relatives in Stevens Point, WI
Nancy and Mary Boushley

Dear Jean. I have just learned of your mom passing. I am so sorry. I know you are sad but did so much for her over the years. Praying for peace and comfort.

To Jean (my second Mama), Kristen, Michael and family ... I will always remember Gertrude as the sweet lady with the infectious laugh. She had a beautiful smile to match her big ole heart! I love you all and I'm sending big hugs all the way from Tennessee :)

Jean we are very sorry to hear about your mom. Thoughts and prayers to your family.

Roy & Lynette Couch
Susan Lancaster

Gertrude was a strong independent woman who loved her family beyond measure . She became friends with my mother several years ago . Although they were not able to see each other often due to distance and my mother's health issues, they did talk on the phone occasionaly. The last time was a few weeks ago and they shared some laughs . Their friendship made the family friendship span four generations, starting with Jean and I then expanding to our daughters who were born a month apart. It now includes Gertrude's and my Mom's great granddaughters who try to connect a couple of times a year and were pen pals over the summer. Gertrude raised Jean to be a good friend and Jean has passed those skills to her children who both have very strong friendships . Although Jean was an only child, Gertrude encouraged the kind of friendships that will ensure her daughter will always have many sisters in her friends. I am pleased to be one of those friends . Just one of the ways Gertrude enriched my life ! She will be missed but will live in our hearts forever.

Sally Baker Frykman